


Memories

by kugure



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-09 14:04:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20996015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kugure/pseuds/kugure
Summary: Memories bring back you.





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [Memories by Maroon 5](https://open.spotify.com/track/2b8fOow8UzyDFAE27YhOZM?si=vyCx_fmDSgOBK2Y3FVsnmA).
> 
> I did the mistake of thinking about Sterek while listening to that song, and here I am. 
> 
> Unbetaed.

At times like this, Derek wished he could get drunk as easily as other people. But being a werewolf, it meant he couldn't, unless special type of wolfsbane was involved. And since he didn't have that particular wolfsbane on his possession at the moment, he could only be satisfied with the bitter taste of alcohol he had, hoping it worked somehow. 

It didn't. 

It had been five years now. Yet the pain was still raw. Gnawing on Derek's insides, actually made him wonder why the hell the pain wasn't enough to kill him yet. 

The glass clinked softly when he dropped it on the table. He knew tears were rolling down his face, but he had no energy to wipe it away. He only wanted his drink. No, he only wanted  _ him _ to be here. But since he couldn't get that, drink was his best companion for now. 

He poured himself another, and raised the glass to no one in particular since he was alone in the room.

_ Cheers to the wish you were here, but you're not. _

*

Derek hated Stiles Stilinski with all of his beings. But months later, that strong hatred turned into an annoyance. And then even later, that annoyance turned into something else entirely. 

It might took a while, but Stiles  _ changed _ Derek. 

Derek didn't know anyone more persistence than Stiles, and he was glad that  _ give up _ didn't exist in Stiles' vocabulary. Because he was the only one who managed to make Derek forgot the pain of losing his entire family. For the first time after the fire, Derek felt…  _ better.  _ Like he managed to finally be able to make peace with his past mistakes, and move forward. 

And it was because of Stiles. 

He taught him how to deal with his pain. And while doing that, he also made Derek believe in  _ forever _ , for once. 

Because if there was someone who was willing to be with him forever, despite all his lack, Stiles was definitely that someone. 

But Derek should've known better. He knew Stiles would stay forever, but of course, Life always had different plans. 

And apparently Life's plan was to take Stiles away from him, until it reached the point where Derek's heart shriveled and turned cold every time he heard someone say Stiles' name. 

Because he had tried to call that name over and over again, hoping that Stiles would be back to him, but to no avail. No matter how much Derek tried to reach out to call Stiles, Stiles would stay gone. 

Though he knew that someday he would be able to reach him. And he could only wait for that day to come.

*

_ Everything's gonna be alright, Derek _ , Stiles always said, with a big grin plastered on his face. 

Derek always believed him when he said that, so now, he would raise his glass to that. 

*

It took a while until Derek was finally able to accept the fact that Stiles had gone. At first, he was angry. The rage Stiles managed to calm resurfaced, and he was worried it was too powerful to stop. 

Stiles managed to stop his rage and hatred back then, but now Stiles wasn't here anymore. 

Though over time, he finally learned to accept it, and despite the fact that he would never stop grieving, he turned this rage and hatred into something else. 

He knew Stiles wouldn't like to see him in despair. So, Derek relit the torch for Stiles, and move forward with it. 

*

Derek didn't know how many drinks he already had for tonight, but he didn't want to stop now. He was a werewolf anyway, his liver would survive. 

Derek filled up his glass again, and raised it to the empty air. 

_ Toast to the ones here today _ . 

Scott. Lydia. Malia. Liam. Him. 

Derek chugged it all up and refilled it once again. 

_ Toast to the ones that we lost on the way.  _

Boyd. Erica. Allison. Kira.  _ Stiles _ . 

Derek would stop drinking eventually. But not now. Because the drink brought back all the memories, especially about what he had been through with Stiles before, and he kind of needed that now. 

Because memories brought back Stiles.

At least for tonight. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Anyway, feel free to hit me up on my [tumblr](http://grettalks.tumblr.com/) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/grettalks?s=09).


End file.
